I have gone through a tremendous growing experience in the past year. I have so many emotions flowing through my mind and heart as I write this, I feel like a can not fully express myself, but I will try my best. I was in a completely new environment surrounded by people who didn't believe in God, it was a wake up call for me, and I doubted my own beliefs, I questioned if they were my own or just what I have been told. I have gone though many internal struggles questioning, if God was real, how could he let so many horrible things happen.
I was frustrated, I hated to see Christians judging others harshly, I hated to see lies and harsh words. I let those situations doubt my loyalty to religion. I wanted so badly to find the 'perfect religion' but in the end I was looking from the completely wrong perspective. Christ is our role model, yet we all make mistakes, so why was I focusing on peoples mistakes rather than focusing on what's really important, actively trying to support one another towards becoming Christ like.
I can now say for myself I have a firm belief that there is a God. There have been countless times I have had answers to my prayers, far too many to attribute to coincidence. He has been helping hand when I felt I couldn't do it on my own, guidance when I felt lost of confused, and a sense of peace when I felt uneasy.
I pray for those who don't believe there is a God, not because I believe they will be condemned if they don't believe in God, but, I want them to have the support and sense of peace I feel when I am close to God. I can't imagine the pain I would feel if I lost a loved one believing I would never see them again, believing this life on earth was it. I pray for those who are hurting, whether it's physical or emotional. I pray for opportunities to serve others. I pray for our leaders to be guided for the welfare of the people rather than selfishness or pride. I pray that those who have gone through similar experiences as I have who have judged their beliefs hardly will have their hearts softened just as I have.
My point in writing this is to remind myself of my spiritual journey I have gone through in the past year. To remind myself and others that we have no place to judge one another, whether your Christian or Atheist Heterosexual or Homosexual, we are all children of God and have not the slightest clue what each person has experienced and will experience. Thank goodness we are in the hands of God, who has endless love for every single one of us. It's so comforting to know I always have someone to turn to for support no matter the circumstance.
