satisfied.

I'm really happy and content right now.

This week has been great.

I love my job, and the people I work with. 

The weather has been lovely. Having a free schedule is great, I have gone to a couple concerts, enjoyed the outdoors and started going on nightly runs (which I actually look forward to, shocking.) 

Kaya found out she will be spending the next 10 months of her life in Senegal, Africa.

I am beyond excited for her. She has been dreaming of going to Africa for years now and she is actually going in August! It will be such an amazing experience for her, I can't wait to hear about all of her adventures, also she will be learning French! How cool! 

It's so odd to look back at the past couple of years at my old self and see how I have grown and changed. I am happy. I don't care what other people think of me. This past year I have come to realize that family is one of the most important things and I need to work harder to form better relations with not only my immediate family but also my extended family. I have found things that I am passionate about. I love traveling, and I have made a vow to myself that I am going to travel the world. I don't care if I have to live frugally for months to save up money, It's so worth it. I want to make a change, a impact, I want to make a difference whether it's big or small. I admire Kaya that she has already found many ways to make a difference. There is a satisfaction and happiness that comes when I help others that I can't describe, it's wonderful. I want to leave a mark, a difference, I want to leave this world giving rather than taking. 

last but not least, I like this song. It has been on repeat for the past week or so. 

thinking.

"...... for us physicists believe the separation between past, present, and future is only an illusion, although a convincing one."

Time is such a odd thing, sometimes it passes quickly, sometimes slowly. Sometimes it seems everything is going right, at other times it seems like everything is falling apart. I don't understand time, or why things happen when they do. But I know it is all part of a plan. Eventually leading up to something great. 

I've been thinking about emotions a lot lately. Most emotions are responses to perception-what you think is true about a given situation. If your perception is false, then your emotional response to it will be false too. As humans, we are often wrong. Sometimes we perceive things differently than what they really are. What if our perception to every single situation was positive, all of our emotions would be positive. That's a nice thought. We are completely in control of our emotions, but we just have to double check and make sure our perception is focused in a positive direction. 

summers of the past.

This is where I spent the majority of my time every summer, growing up. I miss it. 

disappointments.

Life is full of disappointments. 

In fact, sometimes I feel like things get good just so they can quickly turn around and life can look at how vulnerable you are and have a good long laugh. 

Today specifically has made me grateful my happiness comes from within myself. 

Although outside things can easily effect my mood and perspective, the outside is not my only source of happiness. Today has not been happy, in fact I can't remember the last time I shed this many tears. 

I still have many things to be happy about, I have wonderful friends, a loving family, a house to live in, a job, sunshine, a bright future and so much more. Maybe all things eventually work out, maybe they don't. I guess all I can do right now is hope for the best and be glad that I shared a happy month with a happy person. 

In the meantime, let's listen to some french music.

Recap of May to the beginning of June.

I have been a terrible blogger. I always have a problem where I have so much on my mind, I don't know how to share it all. So, I skip blogging all together. But I will try to do a short recap and then hopefully get better at updating this more often! To start off, I graduated!! It has been such a wonderful realization that I will not be going back to high school next year. Now, my future is all up to me, I can go in what ever direction I choose. That sense of independence makes me happy. 

This kid, Tanner Williams has made me so much happier, I didn't know it was possible, but voila it happened! :) 

The weather has been perfect. There has been quite a few rainy days, but also a lot of sunshine. Resulting in green everywhere and beautiful flowers. I absolutely love summertime in Utah. 

Yesterday, I returned from a weekend getaway to Oregon. My friend Katy's boyfriend, Tim graduated. So I tagged along with her. It was so beautiful there and again, perfect weather. One day, I am going to live somewhere that has year round summer weather. 

I feel like I have been to a million, give of take a few, graduations this month!